Mother's Day 2008

Happy Mother’s day to all of you moms! I want you all to know how much I admire you, whether you’re in the middle of the game with kids scrambling around your feet, in the beginning with your little one still inside of you, or on the other side with grown kids and maybe even grand- or great-grandchildren. You are all amazing, and deserve this day of recognition! I only hope that the appreciation of you extends beyond this single day of celebration, because motherhood certainly is 24/7 for the rest of your life.

Most of you know that my mom passed away about 6 ½ years ago (October 23, 2001), and as she was such an important fixture and person in my life, this day is a pretty hard one for me. I’ve had a few moments since being here in Hawaii where I feel as though I’m mourning over the loss of her as if it just happened. The sadness and pain are newly raw and hard to bear. Michael is so great to just hold me and let me soak his shirt. This morning, however, he’s at work and I’m struggling against my emotions and the tears sitting on the edge of my eyelids. I definitely went through a normal ‘mourning period’ right after she died, with family and friends around to help support me and each other. At first it hurt more to drive around town and remember seeing my mom at the shops and restaurants that we frequented or in certain spots around the house, but as time went by those images became more of a comfort to me, as if I could connect with her by seeing us in those places. Having the aforementioned family and friends softened the hurt as well, while we all grieved the loss of this special woman. But I don’t have those places here. And those people are about 3,296 miles away. Please don’t misunderstand me, Michael is wonderful and caring and supportive and loving and encouraging…but it’s just not quite the same. Perhaps it will always be like this, the ups and downs in emotions; laughing at the memories of her total electronic device illiteracy or how every song was her favorite, and the next moment sobbing in yearning of her wise words to tell me what to do and her gentle touch to show me that she’s there, loving me all along. For now, I rest in the assurance and knowledge that she’s nestled safe and snug in our Father’s arms, and hoping that she’s looking down on me, proud of the woman I am and still am yet to be.

Thank you for allowing me to be vulnerable in sharing my heart with you. Enjoy looking at the pictures of my mom and remembering what a remarkable woman she was. I invite you to please leave a comment of a story or memory you may have of my mom, or any other words you’d like to share.

Again, happy Mother’s day to the momma’s and HAPPY DAY TO BE ALIVE to the rest of you!